Can I Opt Not to Move to Assisted Living With My Spouse?

Yes, you definitely have rights. Just like anyone else, you can choose where to you want to live. Your husband also has rights and should be able to use his resources to live in assisted living rather than a nursing home if he’s capable of doing so.

This can get complicated in terms of finances and any obligation you may feel toward your husband. Can you afford to pay for assisted living and for where you live now (especially if the nursing home is covered by Medicaid and the assisted living facility is not)? If your husband cannot live in assisted living by himself, is he asking that you move there too to provide him with the necessary assistance? If so, is this a burden you are willing and able to take on? It’s complicated, but you do have rights.

Harry S. Margolis practices elder law, estate, and special needs planning in Boston and Wellesley, Massachusetts. He is the founder of ElderLawAnswers.com and answers consumer questions about estate planning issues here and at AskHarry.info.